Deacon Ralph Poyo once told me: “if you’re not looking for ways to serve the people around you, then you’re expecting to be served.” Yikes! That’ll preach.
I knew what he meant by the way he carried himself. His words, the way he made eye contact with anyone he was speaking to, and the initiative he took to take care of the people around him. Small things like taking up my plate after a meal (even though he was clearly the most “elite” person in the room - it was a Youth Conference of 4,000 people and he was the Saturday night, keynote speaker).
A few months later, I was running late to a Sunday Mass and his daughter happened to be attending. As I tried to find a pew, she offered me a seat and handed me her song book (already open to the right page) and then went to find a new one for herself. That kind of hospitality must run in the family.
Dream with me for a second. Imagine a building that looked and smelled exactly like your parish. The sanctuary, the pews, the Parish Hall, and the Family Life Center; all the same. But now, imagine that when you arrive on campus just about everyone you see is really excited to see you. Everyone.
As you enter the sanctuary, parishioners see you looking for a pew and they wave to you, inviting you to sit with them. The whole pew joyfully scoots down to make room for you. For some reason there aren’t enough song sheets - so the people that waved you down offer you theirs. It’s a bit extra … but you like it.
The mass is beautiful as usual but during the sign of peace, each person around you takes turns making real eye contact with you as they shake your hand - giving you the impression that you are the only one in the room. The mass ends, and as you’re heading towards the donuts another parishioner greets you with a smile and asks how you’re doing. You share how your week was and then instead of promising to pray for you later, this parishioner offers to pray with you right now. And so, together, right there in the narthex, or in the hall, or the back of the Church you pray with one another… “God, thank you for the gift of life, we know that you are Good. Right now, I ask for a renewed sense of faith and strength for (Insert your name here). In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen!”
Moments later, as you’re heading to your car, a family you’ve been sitting next to for years in the pews sees you and invites you over to their home for Sunday brunch. Eager to get back to your house, you kindly decline their offer. But as you finally sit down in the quiet of your own car, there is one clear thought in the back of your mind… “I really matter to these people.”
Not: “Wow, that was a great homily.” or “Wow, the Church here is very pretty.” or even, “Wow, St. Francis has a great team of Staff.”
How amazing would it be if every time you came to church - no matter the time of day - you were greeted with this type of warmth by fellow parishioners? What if it was normal to walk down the halls your parish and see parishioners spontaneously praying with each other in real-time?
Here’s the thing: I’m convinced the only way we’re going to see this type of radical hospitality in our parishes is if every parishioner intentionally sees themselves as a missionary of God’s love to the people around them.
Jesus said it best: “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and the great ones make their authority over them felt. But it shall not be so among you… Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:25-28).
Jesus, we ask that you inspire within us the courage to serve the people around us with radical hospitality. We give you permission to transform our parish by transforming each of us. Awaken me and send me to those who are most in need of your presence. Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Amen.